Thursday, February 10, 2011

An Arachnophobic Juggling Haddock: Remembering Glenallen Hill



Here's a question for you: name your top five World Series-winning power hitters of the last twenty years. Your list would probably look something like this: Albert Pujols, Manny Ramirez, Mark McGwire, Chipper Jones and Jim Edmonds. A name worth considering, however, is Glenallen Hill.

I know. You're wondering who he is. You're wondering how a guy who played for eight teams in thirteen years can possibly be seen as the greatest in anything. Well, truthfully, it's not his numbers that will get him in my book, though a .271 career batting average, 186 home runs, 586 runs batted in, and championship ring (earned with the Yankees after a 2000 trade from the Cubs) are certainly respectable.

It may seem counterintuitive that a guy nicknamed the Juggler and referred to as "akin to watching a gaffed haddock surface for air" in regards to his defensive struggles in the outfield would be able to attract attention from major league teams, especially those that were eventually championship-bound. The retort is found in his career numbers which while not legendary, were still impressive. His .271 average is 8 points higher than that of Mark McGwire and his 2000 season included 27 home runs, 58 RBI and a .297 average despite only playing 104 games. In 13 seasons of play, if extrapolated out to playing a full 162-game season each year, he averaged 26 home runs and 82 RBI/year. To compare, with the same 162-game extrapolation over 17 seasons, Jim Edmonds has averaged 32 home runs and 97 RBI, with a .284 average. While such theoretical statistics do not factor in the possibility of injury, benching or other unforeseen causes for lack of play, the numbers are nothing to sneeze at.

Really, what made Glenallen Hill a fan favorite and certainly one of my favorite players was how staggering his power was, and how eccentric of a player he ended up being. In May 2000, while playing for the Cubs, Hill jacked a moonshot across the street and onto the roof of a five-story residential building topped by bleachers for fans to sit and take in the game from outside the stadium. To date, Hill is the only player to park a ball onto the roof of that building. Whether the location of his home run was intentional or purely by chance remains a mystery, but his power does not. Hill was also the first National League player to serve as a designated hitter in regular season play in June of 1997 against the Texas Rangers, while playing with the San Francisco Giants.

To date, Glenallen Hill might also be the only major leaguer to end up on the 15-day disabled list after a nightmare, though I'll admit, arachnophobic nightmares do sound pretty horrifying. While a member of the Toronto Blue Jays, Hill had a nightmare about being chased by spiders that was so terrifying, he fell out of bed, smashed through a glass table and fell down a flight of stairs...all while asleep. As if the Juggler wasn't enough of a jab, Hill has now also earned the nickname of, you guessed it, Spider-Man.


He'll never end up in the Hall of Fame, and unless you avidly watched some pretty bad 90s baseball, you've probably never heard of him. But those of us who remember the Juggler will never forget his antics, or the raw power and talent he possessed and continues to impart on players as the first-base coach for the Colorado Rockies.

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